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In This Article:
- Why self-talk is not a sign of insanity but a tool for growth 60
- How to distinguish your inner critic from true inner guidance
- Everyday examples of consulting your Higher Self
- The remarkable 1939 study on children and intuitive eating
- Simple ways to strengthen your connection with inner wisdom
Are You Talking to Your Self Yet? If Not, It’s High Time to Start!
by Marie T. Russell, InnerSelf.comMany of us grew up being told that talking to yourself was a sign of insanity. The common opinion was that if you talked to yourself, you should, at the very least, not answer. Yet, is that really good advice? As it turns out, like many things in life, it depends.
We all talk to ourselves. But there are different qualities to the conversation. There’s the critic—the voice that mirrors the put-downs and judgments you’ve received from others throughout your life. So, that voice, you should definitely not listen to. That voice is nasty and not supportive at all.
The voice I’m encouraging you to not only listen to but to have active conversations with is the voice that comes by many names: Higher Self, Inner Guidance, Intuition, Inner Self, Soul, Spirit, and so on. That voice is the one that is there to help you along on your life’s journey. It is helpful—not pushy. It is loving—not judgmental or critical. It is there to coach and assist you in your decision-making.
Which Is Which?
So how does one differentiate between the voice of the inner critic and the true inner or Higher Self? Well, that’s actually easy. The inner critic is mean, obnoxious, and seems bent on hurting you and putting you down. The voice of the Higher Self, on the contrary, is non-judgmental and seeks to offer advice, alternatives, and different ways to look at a situation that may be troubling you.
As an example: Let’s say you’re having problems with someone. The inner critic might say things like, “He’s such a jerk,” or “You really just can’t win with him/her,” or “You really messed that one up.”
The voice of inner guidance, on the other hand, will say such things as, “He must have had a really hard day to be behaving in that way. Maybe he needs a bit of patience instead of impatience.”
The difference between the two voices is usually like night and day—loving or hateful. It’s like the proverbial image of the angel on one shoulder and the devil on the other.
When Should You Talk to Yourself?
Inner talk involves more than just challenging situations. It can be accessed for all things that take place in your life. Wondering what to eat? The unhelpful voice will say, “Go ahead and have a big bowl of ice cream. You’ll feel better.” The other voice—the one that’s actually on your side—may point out that the sugar high will just cause a crash in energy later, and that perhaps some nuts or another form of protein would serve you best.
You can also access this inner guidance when torn between two choices and having to decide what to do. A friend calls you to invite you to a party. You’re tired. You’ve had a rough day. One side of you says, “Yes, go. You can get drunk and blow off some steam.” The other voice might counsel that what you actually need is a night of rest and some nourishing food to regain your balance.
Advisor On Board
Our inner advisor is always with us. It is always ready to be consulted as to what is best for us at this time. The advice will change in each situation, as it should. One night you might receive advice to go ahead and go out to the party to lift your spirits. Or you might find that the inner advice is to just have a tiny bowl of ice cream and eat it slowly, savoring each mouthful—thus filling the craving without causing a health crisis.
There are no cut-and-dried rules when it comes to higher or inner guidance. Each moment in our life is different. Thus, each moment requires a different solution. Sometimes we need to stand tall and speak our truth. Other times it is best to let things slide.
The only way to know what action is best at the moment is to access your inner wisdom. Rules that have been handed down to us by generations past or religious leaders, past and present, are not necessarily appropriate for this moment.
Basically, the only rule to follow is the one of your inner guidance—your heart, which is your own wisdom. The body and the spirit know what is best for them.
Even Children Can Do It
I remember reading many years ago about a fascinating study that beautifully illustrates the power of inner guidance—something even the youngest among us possess. This study, conducted nearly a century ago by pediatrician Dr. Clara M. Davis, was published in 1939 in the Canadian Medical Association Journal.
What Dr. Davis set out to explore was how children, when left to their own devices, would choose what to eat. Each day, she and her team offered the children a wide selection of whole foods: fruits, vegetables, grains, dairy, meats—about thirty-four simple, unprocessed choices without added sugar or seasonings. These were infants and toddlers, many of them orphans, who were allowed to freely choose not only what to eat but how much.
As you might imagine, at first glance things looked a little chaotic. One child might eat nothing but grapes for a day or two. Another might seem to feast solely on nuts. But over time—days and weeks—the children’s choices naturally balanced out. Without being told what was “good” or “bad,” each child intuitively selected foods that nourished their growing bodies. Remarkably, their meals varied from one another, yet each child ended up meeting their nutritional needs in their own way.
What may seem even more incredible is that some of the children appeared drawn to foods that addressed specific health needs. One child recovering from rickets, for instance, kept choosing cod liver oil until his body no longer needed it.
Dr. Davis concluded that, when offered wholesome options and the freedom to listen to their inner signals, children are capable of regulating their own diets—no external pressure, no persuasion, just trust in the wisdom of the body.
Of course, the food offered to the children didn’t include the addictive qualities of today’s “modern” foods, with their array of sugars, salts, and seasonings—all designed to fool the senses and lead us, ever so subtly, down the path of overconsumption and ill health.
This study, quietly powerful in its simplicity, gave early scientific support to what today we call intuitive eating—and it offers us a reminder that the inner voice that guides us toward balance and well-being is within us all, if only we give it space to speak.
Use It, or Lose It
As with many things, we need to practice until we get it right. And listening to our inner guidance is no different. The more we learn to listen to it, to trust it, and take the “risk” of acting on its recommendations, the more we will learn that it is trustworthy and has our best interests at heart.
Contrary to the voice that leads you down the path of excess and unsupportive behavior, the inner guidance is good for you. The other voice is the voice of judgment, blame, punishment, mockery, self-doubt, low self-esteem, and other people’s opinions. That voice only leads you further away from love, joy, and inner peace.
So, should you talk to yourself? YES! But you have to be aware of which “Self” you are talking to. Are you talking to the “good guy” or the “bad guy”? Once you’re sure you’re connected to the right channel, so to speak, then converse, ask, listen, and discuss. Get in touch with your inner guidance and let it help you along in creating a healthier, happier life for yourself—as well as for those around you.
Musical Interlude:
Original song based on the above article
Marie T. Russell is the founder of InnerSelf Magazine (founded 1985). She also produced and hosted a weekly South Florida radio broadcast, Inner Power, from 1992-1995 which focused on themes such as self-esteem, personal empowerment, and inner well-being. Her articles focus on transformation and reconnecting with our own inner source of love. joy, and creativity.
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Article Recap:
This article explores how self-talk, when tuned to your inner guidance rather than your inner critic, can support healthier choices and emotional well-being. It highlights practical examples and a fascinating historical study that proves the power of trusting your inner voice.
#talkingtoyourself #innerguidance #selftalk #intuition #mentalhealth #selfgrowth #innerselfcom
Are You Talking to Your Self Yet? If Not, It’s High Time to Start! by Marie T. Russell — This inspiring read shows why listening to your inner voice could be the key to a healthier, happier you. #innerselfcom Click to find out more!
